Between the Sheets

I got a list of questions from a reader last week, and it obviously struck such a chord that I received a list this week as well. I’m now going to make this a weekly feature called Monday Menage e Trois. Feel free to email me any quickie questions you’re scared to ask anyone else.

My girlfriend often talks about how poorly her ex treated her. I’m doing my best to support her, but I can tell she’s still harboring a lot of resentment. How can I get her to stop?
It sounds like she needs some serious closure. This would be a prime time for margaritas around a bonfire, where we burn him in effigy. Then hootchify yourselves up and hit the bars. Or you can submit her application to “Intervention”.

I love my boyfriend, and I’m turned on by him. But when we have sex, I start fantasizing about other men. What can I do to focus on the person on top of me?
First and foremost, let me say that no one is going to focus on their partner 100% of the time. It is healthy and natural for your mind to occasionally wander. But it sounds like your concern is valid because you seem to ONLY be aroused when he’s not him. Might I suggest some light role playing? Naughty cop or rugged farmhand, maybe putting on a new persona will help.

What’s your advice to someone who’s interested in playing rough in bed but doesn’t want to cross the line?
This is something you can “test the waters” with before actually discussing it, but be gentle and HIGHLY attentive in your approach. Try hair-pulling or LIGHT spanking, and watch carefully to see if they’re digging it or not. If you do this successfully and you want to explore rougher terrain, be sure to discuss this in full with your partner and create a “safe word”, an alarm that means all playing is done when you hear it.

Send me your questions for next week’s menage e trois!

menage e trois, fantasizing, role playing, spanking